Why We Need to Mind Our Own Business, and Why the Internet Has Made That Nearly Impossible

PLEASE PIN THIS IMAGE: How to mind your business in the Internet age

How to have an online presence and still mind your own business? I examine this question from a Christian perspective in this article. If you’ve been asking yourself if it’s okay for Christians to be on social media, keep reading.

Susie balked. Her stomach twisted as anger began a slow boil beneath her solar plexus. Did I.D.K. Much really do that when he was a kid? That was worse than anything she’d ever heard about B.S. Prez! What was the world of politics coming to?

Thumbs doing a fast dance over her phone screen, she scrolled down to read the comments. Anger became fury, boiling over in hot lava and a stream of curse words. Her friend was defending IDK? What the heck?

Like an out-of-control bus, indignation rolled over and through her, tightening every one of her muscles. In a flash, she was on her other social media site, thumbs flying as she tapped out her opinion, urging the world to stop being stupid by supporting IDK.

The next morning, she went to church and worshipped God.

Or, so she believed…

The 21^st century sin.

This morning, I engaged in a debate with my eighteen-year-old son. To respect his dignity – and to avoid hypocrisy, as you’ll understand as I move on in this post – I’m not going to give details about it. Suffice to say that it had to do with people online spouting opinions about other people (whom they don’t know personally), and that I ended up reminding him that we are not to judge others because the planks in our eyes are bigger than the specks in other people’s eyes (Matthew 7:3-5).

That got me to thinking about Paul’s admonition in 1 Thessalonians 4:11, that Christians should lead quiet lives and mind their own business. It’s a concept I’ve struggled with on and off for the past few years, because if I blog or upload public YouTube videos, am I not encouraging people to get into my business? Even if I’m not, there’s always the danger of becoming one of those armchair judges of Internet personalities, and allowing my opinions to seep through my content.

The beginning of human nosiness.

The fact of the matter is, people have always been nosier than they ought. Gossip is likely as old as the human race, with propaganda not far behind. Every technological advance in communication – the printing press, the telephone, radio, television, the Internet – has only served to increase the difficulty of minding one’s own business. Human beings yearn to connect with each other, but in our fallen state have done so with an increasingly heavier pull to do so via manipulation and persuasion of others to ungodly opinions and perspectives.

I’m not anti-Internet, but…

Twenty-five years ago, websites and online videos pushed the limit of psychological and emotional manipulation; today, social media has made the problem a hundred times worse. People on one side of a social or political issue are convinced they are right, and do everything they can to persuade other people to believe the way they do.

And many – most? – of these beliefs are dead wrong.

The use of language learning artificial intelligent models such as ChatGPT for distribution of propaganda on social media sites has aggravated an already tenuous situation.

I avoid social media for a variety of reasons, but lately, that has become a primary one. From all reports, many threads consist of one of two types: people arguing with the vehemence of a cat under a shower about social and political issues, or people giving the O.P. compliments and virtual pats on the back, cheering them on for their insights and thoughts.

Even when they’re wrong.

Because nobody’s wrong if they believe the same way you do.

And therein lies the problem: human beings are flawed, and therefore none of us – no matter how close to God we believe we are – know the absolute truth about every situation. Worse, our past experiences bias our opinions; and opinions, when ruminated on long enough, become entrenched beliefs, which do a bang-up job of masquerading as Truth.

The core of my conversation with (okay, lecture to) my son this morning centered on this idea, that what we think is truth, often isn’t.

And the problem is much worse today, thanks to the insinuation of relativism into modern thought.

But there’s a larger challenge that Christians face, and that is our flesh. Our flesh – that part of us that flips the birdie at God and says, “I got this, thanks” – tempts us into responding to posts and threads and comments that we believe to be wrong, to be contrary to God’s word. Our flesh begins by whispering that as a Christian, we have a responsibility to correct people online, whether friends, acquaintances, or perfect strangers. It tells us that it’s part of what Yeshua meant by being “salt and light.”

Then, once we engage, it provides justifications for replying with increasing frustration and ire and self-righteousness when others take us to task with what we’ve said.

Finally, we end up flipping a virtual birdie at them, and leave the thread feeling angry, dismayed, and perhaps even in despair. We lose all sight of Yeshua’s way, replacing His light and easy yoke with a heavy burden made by our own hands.

Rather, by our minds.

In the process, we lose our witness with those we initially set out to help.

Should Christians be on social media? Or give up the Internet altogether?

If to no other time, Yeshua was looking ahead to the twenty-first century when He told us to be in the world, but not of the world ([John 17). Technology has made keeping our mind on the things of God more challenging than the pre-television days, and the constant stream of information, advice, and opinions on social media can make Christians feel like they’re getting sucked into a deep pit of worldly quicksand with no way out.

As a fifty-five-year-old woman who has lived most of her life (so far!) without Internet, and who does not engage on social media, I can tell you for a certain fact that it is possible for anyone to thrive without either. Obviously, I have chosen to use certain aspects of the Internet to my advantage. But I temper my use, avoiding social media and places like sensationalist websites and YouTube channels. If I comment on a video – which is rare – it’s to add to the content, or provide a bit of encouragement, not to market my “brand,” debate with anyone, or seek attention.

In other words, I don’t get into other people’s business.

Why?

Why did the apostle Paul advise followers of Yeshua, so long ago, to mind their own business? Not having spoken with the man personally, I can’t tell you for sure. But life experience and common sense, as well as a solid relationship with my heavenly Father, have illuminated several reasons.

1. It’s a lot easier to follow Yeshua’s command not to judge.
2. It’s a lot less stressful. Getting into other people’s business is a good way to invite the spirit of fear into your life. And when you’re full of fear and anxiety, there’s no room for love. Which brings us to…
3. Getting into people’s business isn’t love. It’s manipulation. Manipulation is the biggest sin that everyone ignores.
4. You might be wrong. If you stick your hand into a pile of dung, it will end up all over you if, in the end, your friendly advice or strong opinion is wrong. You could end up causing more harm than good to the other person.

“But what about carrying each other’s burdens?”

You’re allowed to ask someone, “Are you okay?” It’s godly to offer support and prayer if someone reveals a challenge in their life.

That’s love. That’s compassion.

I believe that when Paul told us to mind our own business, he was telling us, through the Holy Spirit, two things. Number one, we’re not to jump in and try to “rescue” people who are living or believing differently than we are. Yes, report a crime. Even stop it, if you can safely do so. Yes, gently correct a fellow believer if they’re obviously choosing a sinful path.

But if you’re an avid homeschooling mother, don’t try to persuade every other mother you meet who sends their children to school to believe what you do about education. Don’t be an armchair nutritionist or physician to people you meet online who talk about their physical woes. Don’t tell people they are idiots for taking a different political stand than you do.

In other words, don't give unsolicited advice and opinions.

Number two, we’re not to obsess over the choices of people outside of our responsibility (usually immediate family) because all that does is lead to worry. Christians worry over a lot of things under the guise of “concern” or “social justice” or “righteous indignation,” but worry is a form of fear, and living in fear is living in sin.

How dare I say that? Well, I didn’t. God did.

“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus [Philippians 4:6-7].”

Worry is anxiety, and it comes from not trusting God with our problems. This verse cannot be more clear that God’s will for His children is for us to walk in peace.

We cannot do that if we are minding other people’s business.

So, how can Christians have an online presence and still mind their own business? It’s simple. Only engage when and where the Lord leads you to.

Completely avoid gossip or anything that even slightly smacks of sensationalism. Even if a Christian started it.

Conservative Christians are as guilty as anyone else of spreading such half-truths (even full-on lies).

If you end up in worry or judgment by what you read, or potentially hurting another person due to your comments?

You totally missed God. Perhaps it would be better for you to completely disengage from social media and controversial content online until you’ve matured to a point where you no longer believe you have the answer to everyone’s problems.

Let peace and love be your guide. 

(For more inspiring content like this, you can follow this blog if you have a Google account, bookmark this blog, follow my blog on Goodreads, and/or check out the books in the sidebar.)